I feel paralyzed. The last time I felt this broken was when I got Covid. I realized then, that to even speak, I needed energy. Now I realize that to cry, I need energy. Energy that I don’t always have. My fear then was losing my life. I was mostly afraid for my daughter growing up without her mother. But I am more afraid now. Not knowing if I will ever see my parents again. If I will be able to go on without them.
This has got to be the hardest trip of my life. I feel like a hostage waiting to be forced onto a plane going to Los Angeles. My body is sitting at gate 25 at San Jose International airport. My mind is in Tehran fearing bombs. My heart is beating beside my parents, my uncles and aunts, beside the innocent people of Iran, Israel, Gaza, Ukraine and many corners of the world worried about their safety.
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